'I am where my attention is'

When we understand that the only real time we have is Right Now, everything changes...

I turned 38 years old on the 6th day of this month! The fact that I've completed another 365 days of life on this planet, has pushed me to wipe clean some residual fog from my lenses. Apart from feeling incredibly blessed with another year of life...I also feel this overwhelming need to truly start living....not just living to fulfill our basic animal instinct for survival...but living mindfully into each moment we're gifted with!

"I am where my attention is" - Jim Fortin

I've been tossing this string of words around in my mind for a while now...and they always end up resonating in my body so acutely that the butterflies take flight every time.

'I am where my attention is'...my attention for far too many years had been on surviving the darkness of the endlessly spinning wheel...the roller coaster of highs and lows...my attention was buried so far down, that I missed countless opportunities for joy and light and the creation of beautiful memories....Memories....an unfortunate side effect of living with anxiety/depression is its effect on memory loss. Reminiscing on the old days is often a one- sided activity with my husband, because I honesty don't remember :( So many precious details lost to the darkness.

'I am where my attention is'...this year of growth has sharpened the awareness of my condition and the power I have to change...the power I have to let in the light. By intentionally focusing on the quality of my thoughts, I can design the quality of my days...and not only my days, but the thousands of seconds that make up each living moment in that day. Jim teaches that time is simply an illusion created by humans and the only 'real time' we have is Right Now...this very moment! He explains that anything that has ever happened to us and anything that will ever happen to us, will only happen in the NOW! Our entire life is the very moment we are living now! Truly grasping this concept is a game changer.

Wherever you are, be all there - Jim Elliot

There is so much power that comes from practicing mindfulness...from practicing to make every second we are gifted with matter! If we are homeschooling, be present and available to pour into the kids...if we are eating, chew slowly and savor every morsel of flavor that erupts in our mouth....if we are working, do so creatively and diligently...if we are having a conversation with others, actively listen and respond with empathy and an open mind...if we are listening to our favorite music...do so as loudly as we want so that the sounds reverberate through our bodies and move us around the room!

When we are trapped in failures, regrets and sadness from the past, or paralyzed with worry about the future, we are completely wasting the gift of right now. 'I am where my attention is'...If I'm not paying attention to the actual living moment, I give up the power I have to be the master designer of my life...I am living this moment by default...allowing negative or limiting thoughts about the past and future to rule the precious moments of the day. I'm done living like this and I hope you are too.

What lies before us and what lies behind us are small matters compared to what lies within us - Henry David Thoreau

True happiness...true peace and serenity can only come from inside us...we hold the key to making this life meaningful and fulfilling. Earlier this year, I was listening to an audiobook recommended by my awesome cousin and this one statement stood out for me:

What can you tell yourself in a single sentence that reminds you of your magic and your wild?

I love the idea of creating a unique string of words just for me to use every time I need reminding. This string of words can be absolutely anything...you can keep it private, close to your heart, or you can share it with loved ones who are instructed to remind you every time you need it. I think Jim Fortin's, "I am where my attention is" is a beautiful grounding reminder to steer our thoughts back to the present. But there are so many positive affirmations that we can feed our minds that force us to focus on the awesome power we have to design our present moments.

The living moment is everything - David Herbert Lawrence

Living in the present moment does not mean forgetting our past and neglecting our future...it means we must focus our energy and attention in creating the best possible now. When we reminisce about the past, do so with gratitude, compassion, forgiveness and a heart set on learning from mistakes...When we think about the future, do so with hope, excitement and a heart set on passionately pursuing our goals and dreams. Whatever we choose to do in this moment show up with intention.

I choose to bring as much light as I can into my living moments so that future reminiscing with my husband will finally be a fun joint activity :) Here's to living our best life NOW!

xoxo,

Jess

Birthday sunset boat ride with reverberating music :)